Evynn’s hair has always had a life of its own. From the moment she was born, it’s been a part of her personality. At four years old, it almost touches her waist, and I know one day if I don’t cut it, she will. I have found leaves, food and even a toy mixed into her trusses. But, yet every morning, we sit on the couch as I brush through the tangles. We have gotten to be a pretty good team. As long as she sits still, looks straight ahead and endures the wait, I make it through the seemingly impossible knots one brush stroke at a time.

When speaker, Beth Moore, talked about how God is the only one that can undo the knots in our lives, I could relate immediately. Not only because of my vast knowledge of Evynn knots, but because our lives in this moment are pretty knotty.

It’s easy to talk about the good God brings from difficult situations, because that means that we’ve gotten through the tough times. What isn’t easy is discussing difficult situations while we’re in the middle of them, waiting to be rescued. On Saturday, Matt and I went to the bank to discuss stopping the payments on one of our loans. Month after month we’ve watched our savings being depleted, and felt that it was the best thing to do, even though just the idea of it was physically and emotionally devastating. Then on Sunday morning I woke up to find that someone had stolen my camera out of our car. For those of you that know me, my camera is an extension of who I am. It was a source of income and it was my passion. When we arrived at church that morning, the last thing I felt like doing was worshipping. I wasn’t angry. I understand that I don’t always understand why things happen. But, I was sad.

Our sermon started,

“So be truly glad. There is wonderful joy ahead, even though you have to endure many trials for a little while. These trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold-though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. So when your faith remains strong through many trials, it will bring you much praise and glory and honor on the day when Jesus Christ is revealed to the whole world.” 1 Peter 1:6-7

Further into the message in learning to trust God was, The Persistence Test. Will I keep my commitments? If we were to stop paying our bill, we wouldn't be keeping our commitment. We got into the car and Matt immediately asked me what I got from the sermon. I said, 'We need to keep paying that bill.' Even if it's until we have nothing left.

Monday morning, we were off to start a new day. The sting of losing the camera and a big chunk of our savings was still fresh. And then --- the car refused to start. “So be truly glad.” I tried, but I ended up crying instead.

But, in the quietness of last night, I kept hearing His word repeated. His words that keep me going in the knottiest of times. “For I know the plans I have for you”, declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you, not to harm you; plans to provide a hope and a future.” (Jer 29:11) And I know He will never leave me nor forsake me because He’s promised me. (Jos 1:5)

Today, I’m living in the hope that I will be able to write and give God the glory for rescuing us in our distress. If I sit at His feet, focus on the path ahead and endure the wait, I have to know that He’s going to undo this seemingly impossible knot, one brush stroke of faith at a time.

For everyone else with knotty lives, may this hope extend to you.

Courtney