So many things stand out in my memory from that day. Despair, pain, grief, ‘deaf’. And an intense light. The light seemed blinding in the waiting area, the hospital room, the cloudless sky. I remember my irritation at its intensity. Why, on my darkest day, would it be so bright. Why isn’t the rain pouring down. Why, Lord, aren’t you crying, too?

I realize now that I had written the novel of Rhyan’s life long before she was born. My hopes, dreams and expectations of who she would become, not realizing that futures are so fragile. That brittle book fell to the ground that day and shattered next to my heart. The doctor wrote a novel for her, too. His read that Rhyan would never hear, never speak, never sing, never be comforted by my lullaby whispered in her ear. And the pages of that book were torn and set on fire the moment she first heard my voice.

God and God alone is the author of Rhyan’s story. He seared the words onto the pages of her life before He created time. And the ink from Rhyan’s script spilled onto mine and penned my purpose as Rhyan’s Hope was spoken over my heart. It was also used to write a most beautiful chapter for Jillian. Because of you and an extremely generous donation from The Halliday Foundation, the necessary funds have been raised in Rhyan’s Hope for Jillian to receive her implant. On December 16th , Jillian’s story will include another miracle.

Life can be so difficult. Over the past year, I’ve seen so much pain in the lives of those I love. There are those that have been forced to say good-bye in this life to their loved ones, others have seen financial devastation, marriages have been tested and some have failed, and it feels like our world will soon implode. Not long ago, I had a firm grasp on the robe of the Healer, ready to follow where He led. But somewhere over the last months, I’ve let go of His robe and held fast to His hand. It’s only when we focus on the light of His face that the darkness disappears. When we stare into His light, our feet will never shuffle from exhaustion, we will not stumble, we can never fail. And if, for a moment, we glance around us instead of up, and we start to fall, we might loosen our grasp, but His hold will tighten and He will raise us.

The brilliant light from that day of Rhyan’s diagnosis was there specifically for this moment in time. So that I can look back and see that it wasn’t my darkest day at all. It was the Lord telling me that He was holding me up in my pain, and we can use our pain to light the way to His will. We all have a novel. Each of our stories are page turners, and they are all so very different. But if Jesus holds are hearts, we are certain to all have written in the books of our lives, the very same ending. The very same happily ever after.

This couldn’t have been done without you. You have been there in support, encouragement and prayers, and I love you all so much. Thank you, as always, for allowing yourselves to be written into the story of Rhyan’s life.

In His love, Courtney

I just heard from Jillian's mom. Her surgery was a success at just under 3 hours and she is home and recovering.

Children are so resilient. With Rhyan's first implant, she was up every 2-3 hours requiring pain meds the night following the procedure, and by the next evening no one would have guessed she had just had major surgery (major to me anyway!!).

I'll keep you posted on Jillian's progress as I'm updated by her mommy. As it stands, in four weeks baby Jillian will hear her mommy's voice for the first time ever. And their world will be forever changed.

Our original candidate for the Cochlear Implant was a little girl named Jillian. Gratefully, she was approved by her insurance and never needed outside assistance. Today she is going in for surgery, and it brings back such a flood of emotions. The fear and uncertainty of the surgery was with us during both of Rhyan's surgeries. However, as He always does, God gave us strength and peace beyond understanding. It was on the way home, both times, that it really began to sink in. My baby was going to hear. The hard part was over, now we wait for her to hear our voices. I don't think there's anything that I can compare that to.

I pray for a successful surgery for Jillian and peace for her mommy and daddy. Tonight might prove to be difficult in dealing with the after effects from surgery, but with the dawn comes a whole new look on life.

I believe it's like that in life. God performs surgery on us every day. With our thoughts and our beliefs. He takes things away and calls us to be obedient by giving up things that we don't want to give up. But, as painful as it is for a time, the dawn comes with a whole new look on life. We are different. We are closer to Him. And with that closeness comes the ability to hear.

I pray today for Jillian's surgery, and for the peace today to give way to the excitement and awe tomorrow of what this new life will bring. I pray the same for you.

In His Love,